Relationship Burnout & Emotional OverwhelmTherapy in Los Angeles for people WHO LOVE someone with a personality disorder
Loving someone with a personality disorder can affect nearly every part of your life.
You may spend your time trying to manage conflict, walk on eggshells, prevent emotional blowups, keep the relationship stable, or care for the other person that your own needs have slowly disappeared into the background.
At Sawtelle Psychotherapy Group, we specialize in therapy for people who love, care about, or are deeply impacted by someone with a personality disorder, either diagnosed or suspected. Whether it’s a relationship with a partner, parent, child, sibling, friend, or ex-partner, therapy can help you better understand the dynamic, address the impact of relational trauma, and reconnect with yourself in the process.
When You’ve Spent Years Managing Someone Else’s Emotional World
Loving someone with a personality disorder can slowly pull your entire nervous system into survival mode and reshape your life.
You may find yourself:
Walking on eggshells to avoid conflict
Constantly monitoring someone else’s moods or reactions
Feeling responsible for keeping the relationship stable
Struggling to set boundaries without guilt
Over-explaining yourself to prevent misunderstandings
Losing trust in your own emotions or perceptions
Feeling emotionally exhausted, anxious, resentful, or chronically overwhelmed
Prioritizing the relationship over your own mental health and needs
Many people come to therapy after years of trying to become “better” at handling the relationship — only to realize how deeply the dynamic has impacted their own anxiety, self-esteem, emotional stability, and sense of self.
Therapy can help you step out of chronic survival mode and reconnect with your own needs, values, boundaries, and emotional wellbeing.
who this therapy is forTherapy for Partners, Adult Children & Loved Ones of People with Personality Disorders
Many therapies, like Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) focus on treating people with personality disorders. At Sawtelle Psychotherapy Group, we focus on you — the person who is being impacted by the relationship.
We work with:
partners, ex-partners, and family members of people with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
loved ones of people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD)
folks who are estranged or chosen to go no-contact from loved ones
adult children of emotionally immature and unpredictable parents
family members navigating chronic emotional volatility and relational instability
and people struggling with relationship burnout, relational trauma, codependency, anxiety, and emotional exhaustion
Many clients come to therapy feeling emotionally stuck between:
love and resentment
empathy and burnout
guilt and anger
hope and hopelessness
Therapy can help you untangle those experiences without judgment and focus on yourself again.
The Emotional Impact of Loving Someone with a Personality Disorder
Relationships affected by personality disorders and severe emotion dysregulation can become emotionally consuming over time.
You may gradually begin organizing your life around:
avoiding conflict
preventing abandonment
managing emotional reactions
maintaining stability
or keeping the other person regulated
Over time, this can contribute to:
chronic anxiety
emotional burnout
depression
low self-esteem
hypervigilance
people-pleasing
emotional exhaustion
and difficulty trusting your own needs or perceptions
Even when the relationship includes love, closeness, or meaningful connection, it can still leave you emotionally depleted.
Therapy can help you better understand the relational patterns while also helping you reconnect with your own identity, needs, values, and emotional well-being.
Therapy for Boundaries, Burnout, Anxiety & Relationship Stress
At Sawtelle Psychotherapy Group, many of our therapists are trained in Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), an evidence-based treatment originally developed for individuals struggling with intense emotional dysregulation and chronic interpersonal conflict.
This training gives us a deeper understanding of the relational patterns that often develop in relationships impacted by personality disorders.
More importantly, it helps us support the people who love them.
Rather than reducing these relationships to simplistic advice like “just leave” or “cut them off,” we help clients navigate the real complexity many people experience:
loving someone while feeling emotionally depleted
wanting boundaries while fearing guilt or conflict
feeling compassion while also recognizing the toll the relationship has taken
Therapy at Sawtelle Psychotherapy Group can help you:
set healthier boundaries
tolerate conflict without collapsing into guilt or panic
communicate more effectively
reduce emotional reactivity
stop over-functioning in relationships
and build a stronger sense of self outside of caregiving or crisis management
Our approach is both compassionate and practical — helping you move away from survival-mode in your relationships and toward greater steadiness, clarity, and emotional flexibility.
Therapy in West Los Angeles & Throughout California
We provide in-person therapy in West Los Angeles near Sawtelle, Brentwood, Santa Monica, Westwood, Mar Vista, Marina del Rey, Culver City, and Century City.
We also offer virtual therapy across California, New York, Florida, and Vermont.
Our therapists work with adults navigating difficult relationship dynamics, emotional burnout, anxiety, family stress, caregiving fatigue, and chronic relational overwhelm.
MEET THE TEAM
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Brooke Schwartz, LCSW
Founder & Therapist
Areas of expertise: perfectionism, anxiety, depression, first time in therapy, personality disorders, relationship and interpersonal challenges, and life transitions.
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Mitchell Hale, LCSW
Staff Therapist
Areas of expertise: LGBTQIA+ issues, trauma symptoms and PTSD, OCD, body dysmorphia, anger, anxiety, career changes, critical self-talk, and depression
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Sara Arpiarian, LCSW
Staff Therapist
Areas of expertise: anxiety, depression, relationship and interpersonal challenges, trauma, grief and loss, ADHD, adoption-related issues, parenting skills, and navigating life transitions.
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Sophie Elkins, MSW, ASW
Staff Therapist
Areas of expertise: teen and young adult mental health, anxiety, perfectionism, body image, life transitions, self-esteem, trauma, couples, relationship dynamics, and effective communication strategies.
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Kaitlin Christy, LMFT, APCC
Staff Therapist
Areas of expertise: child, teen, and young adult mental health, emotion dysregulation, anxiety (OCD, panic, phobias), depression, self-esteem, family dynamics, play & art therapy, parent-child work, impulse control, ADHD, and personality disorders.
Frequently Asked Questions About Therapy for People Who Love Someone with a Personality Disorder
Is this therapy for the person with the personality disorder?
1
No. This therapy is specifically for the person affected by the relationship dynamic — including partners, family members, loved ones, and caregivers.
What if my loved one has never been formally diagnosed? Will you diagnose them?
2
This is very common! Many people seek therapy because of emotionally difficult relationship patterns regardless of whether there is an official diagnosis. The impact on you is the part that matters most to us.
While we can’t formally diagnose someone we aren’t working with, we can help you make sense of your loved one’s symptoms using our clinical and diagnostic lens.
Can therapy help me set boundaries?
3
Yes. Many clients struggle with guilt, fear, anxiety, or conflict when trying to set boundaries. Therapy can help you build healthier relational patterns while staying connected to your values.
What if I still love the person?
4
You might! Therapy is not about telling you whether to stay or leave a relationship, to cut someone off or to maintain contact. It’s about helping you better understand yourself, your needs, and the impact the relationship has had on your emotional well-being so that you can take values-aligned action, whatever that means to you.
Can therapy help with codependency or people-pleasing?
5
Absolutely. Many people in these relationships develop patterns of over-functioning, emotional caretaking, self-sacrifice, and chronic people-pleasing that contribute to burnout and emotional exhaustion.
How do I know if a relationship has become emotionally unhealthy?
5
Emotionally unhealthy relationships are not always obvious, especially when love, loyalty, or long history are involved. Some signs may include constantly walking on eggshells, feeling responsible for another person’s emotions, struggling to set boundaries without guilt, feeling emotionally drained or hypervigilant, or losing trust in your own needs and perceptions. Therapy can help you better understand the relationship dynamic, reconnect with yourself, and make decisions from an emotionally regulated and intuitive headspace.
If loving someone has started to feel emotionally consuming, therapy can help you reconnect with yourself again.
Together, we can work toward healthier boundaries, greater emotional steadiness, stronger self-trust, and relationships that feel less overwhelming to navigate.
Schedule a Free Consultation
In-person therapy in West Los Angeles
Virtual therapy across California
Evidence-based and personalized care